***"Debut vinyl by the guitarist of DONKEY NO NO presents two different sides of this mysterious maestro. 'Zoltar Hid All the Locks' is a full on studio quintet session where JEREMY LATCH (formerly of the GRUDGES) played clarinet, ADAM LANGELLOTTI (ex-Grudges, FORE EROS, etc.) played percussion and ran the board, MATT ROBIDOUX (ex-SPEEDY ORTIZ, CURSE PURSE, etc.) played guitar and drum box, and JEN GELINEAU (Donkey No No, EGG EGGS, etc.) handled the fiddle. The sound on this ranges from Donkey No No's woodsy smoke house charm to segments that really channel early, just post-Barrett Floyd without doing any apery. The 'Minnows' side is all OMEED, doing solos tunesterism then taking on the brute fascism of Dumbledonny Trump the way only an American with a Middle Eastern background can. The side opens with Omeed working in an ur-American tradition (somewhere between Buck Owens' 'Act Naturally' and Paul Newman's version of 'Plastic Jesus' from Cool Hand Luke). From there, reality starts to get sliced, like shifting shards from the brain of Philip K Dick. Songs, constructions, faux-Sinatra homages and flat-out collages bend through each other in unexpected ways, culminating in sequential tape assemblages that says FUCK YOU TRUMP as loudly as anything I've yet heard. Jump on the Omeed train. Your children will be proud you did." --Byron Coley, 2018 Edition of 300.